Newsletter: This Thanksgiving, Build Bridges with MAGA Relatives and Friends
Stop trying to persuade them out and remember good times and focus on values
This week’s livestream will take place on Wednesday, Nov. 26th from 2:00-3:00 p.m. EDT. Join us with your questions! You can see last week’s recording here if you missed it.
It’s Thanksgiving week in the United States again, and for many of my readers, that means sharing time with family.
For some of us, that means not seeing relatives we have disinvited. Invite them, even last minute! Tell them you want them back in your life. Apologize if necessary. Be warm, focus on the need for love and connection in these crazy times. Even MAGA folks know things are crazy now! I believe with Marjorie Taylor Greene’s public messaging and Trump calling her a traitor and then backwalking it, there are so many people having doubts. People need face-saving ways to exit. People need to feel safe to even surface. But don’t push. Just have a good time, tell stories, jokes, share photos, videos. They will bring things up about politics - remember, the goal is reality-testing, and the method is to ask questions, not persuade them with facts or logic.
We have pinned a helpful post for our paid subscribers, “5 Phrases That Push Cult Members Deeper In (And What to Say Instead),” and everyone can view our special Thanksgiving video guide here.
(For more helpful advice on that, check out my interview with David Pakman and an article in the Huffington Post!)
However, as vital as it is to keep talking to our MAGA-believing family and friends, prevention is also important, and a good use of our time is always to protect our children and vulnerable loved ones.
Prevention starts early, and it involves teaching young people how to spot and avoid manipulation and predatory influence, whether from a political leader, a spiritual “guru,” or even an intimate partner.
Talking to Your Kids About Cults
part one
My latest in a series of guides for our paid subscribers is a two-part article, Talking to Your Kids About Cults (by Age).
In the first part, published this past Friday, I share advice based on the latest neuroscience for parents when talking with their children about cults and control, including:
Understanding the fundamentals of how young brains develop
How to support self-esteem and confidence
Understanding the differing cognitive capabilities of young children, children, and tweens
Developing critical thinking about influence and advertising
Introducing your child to media literacy
How to use age-appropriate language to describe manipulative tactics
Part 2, on how to speak to teenagers and transitional-age youth entering college and the workforce, will be released this upcoming Friday. Paid subscribers get access to both articles, so no matter how old your child is, you will learn how to frame these crucial conversations.
Paid subscribers can read part one of this article now.
They also get access to my complete archive of practical guides, cult history, and fascinating interviews with experts in the field, such as:
Impeachment and the Do’s and Don’ts of Talking to Trump Supporters - Some suggestions on what to say when speaking with Trump supporters, including a handy downloadable infographic.
How to Help a Friend or Family Member Out of Their Extreme Belief - A helpful guide when talking with loved ones entrapped in any extreme, destructive belief system.
For Ex-Members: Surviving the Holidays - For those who have left a cult but still have family members and friends in the group. A guide on how to survive that challenge during the holiday season.
The Dark Side of Christian Homeschooling
Unfortunately, for many children, their parents not only won’t teach them about cults, but are instead indoctrinating them into their own cult’s mindset, especially in the world of conservative Christian homeschooling.
I want to emphasize that not all parents who homeschool are like this, but it is also clear that we desperately need more regulation in how homeschooling is managed and regulated.
In this week’s episode of my Cults, Culture & Coercion podcast, “The Kingdom of Children: A Liberation Theology | Homeschool Ideologies in Evangelical Christianity,” I spoke with Ryan Stollar, MHA, MA, who is a wounded healer. He is now a child liberation theologian and advocate for children and abuse survivors.
This talk is a compelling and haunting look into the world of religious homeschooling and how millions of American children are being denied access to basic, scientific education in favor of religious indoctrination.
These children also experience a lack of access to mental health education, resulting in many young people engaging in self-destructive behaviors and struggling to cope with the trauma of their upbringing.
This interview is eye-opening, and many people will benefit from learning about what homeschooling looks like today.
Listen on Apple | Spotify | Watch on YouTube
Or read the full blog post version:
The Kingdom of Children: A Liberation Theology | Homeschool Ideologies in Evangelical Christianity
As always, please let us know what you think about these pieces or what you’d like to see us discuss in the future. Thanks so much!
"This Thanksgiving, Build Bridges with MAGA Relatives and Friends"
Those are very wise and compassionate words and I will try mightily to do just that by not obsessing on how my descendants and countless others will suffer from the damages inflicted on them during this sad time in American history.
Steven you’re such a kind person— I just can’t do what you suggest. My sister is progressive so our politics are fine, but she doesn’t want to have anything to do with me and I get so tired of being rejected. I just can’t reach out anymore. It’s humiliating.